Guidance on How Relapse Happens and How to Prevent It
You may just be thinking about relapse, or maybe you’ve already started sliding down that slope. Either way, it’s something that keeps you up at night. It’s hard to escape feelings of guilt, shame, and fear about what’s going to happen if you give in. If you’ve already relapsed, you might be worried about what is going to come next.
Don’t worry; relapse doesn’t take you back to square one. All you need to get clean again is a desire to do better. Then, you pick yourself up and keep taking steps forward.
Relapse doesn’t make you weak. It simply makes you human, and, like every human, you deserve grace, support, and the chance to keep moving forward.
At South Shores Detox, we believe understanding why relapse happens is the first step in preventing it. This guide will help you understand the question: why do I keep relapsing? What’s more, if you’ve already backtracked, how to find your footing after.
Why Do People Relapse from Substance Abuse?
It’s hard not to think of words like “failure” after you’ve relapsed. This thinking is negative, unhelpful, and untrue. You aren’t a failure if you relapse. Many people relapse during recovery from substance abuse disorder. If getting clean were easy, there wouldn’t be people across the United States struggling.
There are a lot of possible “whys” when it comes to relapse. Even if you’ve attended rehab, maybe it wasn’t a good fit. It’s possible you haven’t developed enough healthy coping skills for stress, emotional pain, or external triggers.
Or, maybe mental health issues or unresolved trauma were overlooked during recovery, setting you up for failure. Without a solid support system and relapse prevention plan in place, it’s all too easy to slip back into old habits when things get hard.
The Stages of Relapse
Relapse doesn’t usually happen all at once, instead, it unfolds in stages. First, you’ll notice subtle changes in your emotions, followed by mental battles against the desire to use. If not caught in these first stages, you’ll physically relapse and use alcohol or drugs again.
Your power lies in recognizing these stages at step 1 or 2 and being able to prevent relapse, before you get to the negative consequences that come with the last stage. Being able to recognize relapse stops the spiral and gives you the chance to step in and change course, even if you’re already thinking about using again.
Emotional Relapse
In the earliest stage, emotional relapse, you may not be considering using alcohol or drugs yet. Instead, you’ll notice an emotional shift. You feel different about addiction recovery. You might isolate yourself from family members and friends, or avoid talking about your feelings.
It becomes easy to do things like neglect self-care, skip therapy, and avoid support meetings, even though this is the time when sticking to your recovery plan matters most.
Mental Relapse
Mental relapse describes a battle between your new self, focused on the hope that the recovery process provides, and your old self. Sure, there’s a part of you that wants to stay sober. But, the other side of you starts to dream about past alcohol or drug use, maybe even thinking that it wasn’t “that bad”.
As your cravings get more intense, you may even come up with a plan to use without being caught. Catching yourself in this stage is critical, as the next step is physical relapse.
Physical Relapse
Physical relapse is the act of using again. This could mean taking one drink, using a substance once, or fully returning to previous patterns. It often follows emotional and mental relapse when warning signs have gone unchecked.
While it is a sign that you need help, relapsing doesn’t mean all your progress is lost. Don’t feel ashamed or focus on the negative emotions that might push you toward using a second, third, or fourth time. Instead, focus on taking the right next steps. Relapse can be a turning point, it doesn’t have to be the end of your recovery journey.
Relapse Prevention: How to Fight Against the Desire to Use
Although relapse is common, addicts do recover. We see it all the time at South Shores. The first step is to let go of that shame and negative feelings. Your desires don’t mean you are doing something wrong, and what is much more important is how you choose to respond to these emotions.
We understand how overwhelming it can feel to battle temptation, but these are feelings, and they will pass. Having a relapse prevention plan in place will help you know a clear path to battling these temporary feelings, because they are temporary. You might go for a nature walk, journal how you are feeling, call a sponsor, or find a healthy distraction.
Learning to sit with the discomfort without acting on it is a key part of long-term recovery. Taking these steps will give you an edge on relapse prevention and staying sober.
Putting Your Coping Mechanisms to Practice
Coping tools only work when you use them. Start by learning what works for you and trying different skills until you have several options. In recovery, having more tools in your toolbox only benefits you.
Your coping skills don’t have to be big, grand gestures. Small things like deep breathing, grounding techniques, calling someone you trust, or attending a support meeting put an abrupt halt to the path you’re on.
Even though it might feel easier to give in to cravings, each time you choose a healthy coping skill instead, you are becoming stronger and more confident in your ability to stay clean.
Staying Busy
Often, recovering addicts will tell you an important part of relapse prevention is staying busy. It’s much easier to give into emotions and thoughts when you are bored. This doesn’t mean that you should avoid your feelings, but it is better to give your brain alternatives to obsessing over emotions that might be hard to deal with.
You can do anything that brings you purpose or makes you happy. Participate in a hobby, exercise, go to work, volunteer, or organize your space. Find a new project that makes you happy.
Practicing Self-Care and Supporting Mental Health
You’ll notice drastic changes in your life after getting sober. This happens from getting clean, as well as the healthy habits you put into place. Prioritize structure, sleep, eating well, movement, and self-care to support your mental health. Learn to recognize your emotional needs through therapy and mindfulness. As you care for your body and mind, you’re building resilience against the stressors that often lead to relapse.
Staying Connected to a Recovery Network and Support Group
Connection is one of the strongest protectors against relapse. SMART Recovery meetings, 12-step groups, outpatient therapy, and sober friends can all make a difference. These people understand your journey and want to see you succeed.
Without a recovery network, you might feel isolated or like you don’t have somewhere to turn. Recovery can feel isolating without community, leaving you feeling like you don’t have somewhere to turn when you face relapse. But, with regular connection through attending meetings and utilizing your support system, you’ll stay accountable and encouraged through addiction recovery.
Setting Boundaries That Protect Your Progress
Not everyone in your life will support your recovery, and that’s why healthy boundaries are essential. Saying no to certain people, declining invites to high-risk environments, or distancing yourself from toxic dynamics helps protect your progress.
It can be hard to distance yourself from certain people and places, but remember that boundaries aren’t about punishment. They create a safe space for you to blossom in recovery, outside of substance use. With healthy limits, you’ll have room to heal, rebuild, and stay focused on your goals.
When to Seek Professional Help to Prevent Relapse
A big mistake that people make is waiting to get help until after they’ve relapsed. Even if you’re only at risk, reach out to South Shores, a sponsor, or someone who can help.
Remember, not all treatment programs are created equally. Even if you’ve tried rehab and ultimately relapsed, it doesn’t mean that there’s no hope. It means you might benefit from the extra care you’ll find at an accredited treatment center like South Shores, where we focus on personalized care and evidence-based treatment for substance use disorder.
Of course, this doesn’t mean that there’s ever a “wrong” time to get help. You can reach out before, during, or after relapse occurs. Remember that asking for help shouldn’t be shameful. It’s a strength to know when you need support, not a weakness.
Find a More Supportive Road to Recovery at South Shores
Understanding relapse is the first step. Taking action is the next. Look at these cravings as an opportunity to reconnect with your coping skills, rebuild your support network, or talk to someone about what you’re going through.
It doesn’t matter if you’re just thinking about relapse or have already had that slip. What does matter is your next steps and how you handle relapse going forward. Call South Shores Detox to get yourself back on track today.